Saturday, January 19, 2013

Sometimes I could just scream, sometimes I could cry

So for months now I haven't talked to who I thought was my best friend. She posted some really offensive things on Facebook for months. The worst of it was the final straw when I see a picture of the Mormon presidential candidate in his garments. That is something that is so sacred and private and for it to be exploited like that by her , knowing that I too in fact am Mormon took the cake. I attempted to call her several times to try and talk to her about the situation, but she wouldn't answer. At that point I removed her from my Facebook page to avoid seeing the nonspiritual posts any longer.

I hadn't heard from her in sometime and then one morning out of the blue she calls me to talk about going to Region to talk about a Region phone line idea she had been working idea she had. That was it. I didn't talk to her again. Finally I left her a email to tell her that I loved her and that I was thinking about her. I did this a few times, and then January 1st I receive the most hateful email from her that you can imagine. She tells me to stop harassing her, and how all I want is to be around when she's miserable. That I'm jealous of her happiness, and ten tons of other horrible lies that just devastated me. I called my sponsor because the first thing I wanted to do was retaliate with an email and let her know how wrong she was and that her husband is getting loaded, and be mean and spiteful. Spiritually, that would be wrong. I didn't do that. I am still hurt and angry. I keep praying that she gets her crap together and doesn't get loaded out of it.


Then there is my child. He and his wife moved in in August. They haven't paid a dime in rent. They did get Food Stamps for a while, but they wanted to spend it on what they wanted to even though, we paid all of the household bills and when they ran out of the easy stuff to cook they would eat what we bought too. So here we are months later after hundreds and hundreds of dollars of gas and cigarettes being spent on them, food and shelter as well, and I ask for a total of 27.00 of stuff to be bought and to be paid back for their portion of lunch that I was told I would be paid back for, and I'm told so the money I spent to help you get your phone and the paper towels meant nothing? Are you fricking kidding me???????? I am so tired of people being ungrateful jerks all of the time! Now if I go buy soda tomorrow, they will drink it. Will they buy it? NO!!!

Then there is the other room mate. She has lived with us before. She gets weird sometimes and then shortly after that she's loaded. Well, she's had a lot of stomach issues recently. She stayed in the hospital for 6 days and they did a scope and found out she has cancer in her stomach. I empathize with that. I truly do. What bothers me is when she tells me one thing and then does another, or lies to me. I hate it! She did it again tonight! I do not have stupid tatooed across my forehead!

Then there is my husband. I am not complaining. I love him more than life itself. I get frustrated when I feel like he gets over the top angry over nothing. I know he needs meds! He is so against needing them and it irritates me! He yells all of the time. He gets mad at the drop of a hat. no one can say anything. It just adds more stress on me. I want him to be happy and relax a little. I guess I just need to pray for him more.