I am sitting here again, this time the day has passed and it's almost tomorrow. I have had such a Wonderful Birthday!!!!!
I have learned how to use this whole Blog thing, (well, sort of) and I also updated Myspace, Facebook, AND Get ready for it........ I have and interview FRIDAY!!!!! Woo HOOO!!!!!
I can't friggin wait! I needed this so badly. I talked to all of my kids today, they all called me but one daughter. I'm okay with that! I was able to talk to my best friend, and my lil' man called me to tell me happy birthday too!
I'm sad that tomorrow is the anniversary of my best friend's mom's death, but I know that I will see her again, and I also know that I can be there for her and her girls. A while back that wasn't possible. Just recently, I was so overwhelmed at the fact that they are still in my life and that we are so close.
I love her children so much, and she has the most beautiful heart. Sometimes I don't think she knows just how strong she is. Sometimes I get envious that she got the girls, but I enjoy the fact that they are in my life so much the envy goes out the window!
My baby's birthday is at the end of this month. She would have been 17 this year. I wonder what she would be like. My heart aches at times, but other times it doesn't. I think that after so long, Heavenly Father allows us to just to be. It's been at least a year since I've been to her graveside. I want to go, but I don't.
One day, I will hold her like I wasn't able to do here on earth. I really am okay about it all at this point I think. I went to a meeting the other day and ran into a woman I hung out with as a youth, and she was around during that time in my life. She still can't listen to "The Dance" to this day. It's definitely hard for me too.
I was also looking at pictures of the ones that I love here with me in life today. I am so very blessed with the men that I have in my life, and my youngest is very handsome. I would not have him at all if I hadn't lost my daughter. I Love him so much!
It's late, and I have to take that baby to the Ortho Surgeon tomorrow morning. Life on lif'e terms!